The Eyre Affair

A book I would never have read or even heard of if it weren't for my book club. And well I loved it. What a great read. Really good fun, full of imagination and a great story. What more could you want from a book?! 

I don't even know how to write about it. It's set in a parallel reality in 1985 in a secretive government department in Swindon. It's a Britain where Wales is an unfriendly breakaway Republic, the Crimean war has been raging for over 150 years and extinct animals can be bought back to life. People can also time travel and also portal into the pages of classic novels and chat to the characters and change the plots for ever. Infact books, plays and literature are the number one pastime of people. Books are the beating heart of this society and the evil Mr. Hades has decided to take Jane Eyre hostage for a ransom of a billion pounds.

Miss Next is the full on Swindonian heroine of the novel and she sure kicks arse with her time travelling car, her first edition of Jane Eyre in her pocket and her old friend Mr Rochester who can also magically portal in the other direction out of the novel to help her in times of need. Infact in this reality Jane Eyre has a different ending and Mr Rochester is totally heart broken that Jane marries St. John Rivers. So Miss Next goes out of her way to help change Mr Rochester and Jane's destiny.

Yes, it all sounds completely mad and in many ways it truely is bonkers but I loved it. I think having read Jane Eyre is a must and having a copy comes in handy. The only thing I didn't like were the dumb names. Here I just think Jasper Fforde went a bit over the top and I don't think I understood all the little in jokes. OK, Jack Schitt was obviously a baddie, but why the main character was called Thursday Next, I don't know. I just found it irritating. I understood the character of Oswald Mandias but that's only because I checked out Ozymandias on line after watching an episode of Breaking Bad. So yeah, I can kind of see why the novel has gained a cult following. But hey, me too! I loved it, loved it, loved it. Pure brilliant, geeky barminess with great use of language. Get a copy.( Sorry mine is not going to be lent out.  I will read it again when I'm feeling glum and in need of a laugh! )

Blood and Beauty

This book was really enjoyable. But I'm glad that I don't have to lug the enormous hardback copy I had around with me any more. (It was another 9p bargain from 'Help' the Aged.)

I have never watched anything  about the Borgia family of Rome on TV because I don't have Sky but after this read I feel like I know a damn lot. I have been transported into the corrupt Vatican of the late 15th century and I loved it all. Everyone there was a political, selfish tyrant using the power of God, (trademark) and warfare to gain more land, more political support, more power and more money. Reading about the war plans was like being inside the head of a despot. Loyalties constantly were shifting between the houses which ruled the independent states of Italy, the most powerful States for the Borgias of Rome, being Naples and Milan.   The Borgias were constantly at war with  their neighbours with a bit of French and German interference thrown in to help and hinder. Not forgetting of course that Alexander Borgia, the Pope, was actually a Spanish guy, so even Spanish mercenaries were shipped over too.

Game of Thrones must have been based a bit on this family and their outrageous ways. There was a rumour that the son and daughter of Pope Alexander had an incestuous love affair but Sarah Dunant disagrees and in this book the local people just gossip about them. Also the oldest son of the pope might have killed the youngest son but again Dunant reserves judgement and the murderer is never found.   I actually liked the outrageous pope and his beautiful daughter, Lucrezia, who is just a political pawn who the pope marries off three times at his whim, destroying her previous husbands when they become enemies. I also liked Cesare, her brother, but what a bad, bad man!!!  Watching him change from a handsome young lad full of life , to a man who only wears black and a mask because of his facial pock marks from getting the new 'french' disease of syphillis was fascinating. Yes, a good read. Sarah Dunant wrote really well, making it all seem quite modern and also quite funny. A much better historical novel than that tedious Wolf Hall!